Some people need to LEARN before they speak. Not everyone responds to treatments the same way. Some manage fine without medications and some do not. Some can just decide to think a certain way and poof things change some CANNOT. Neither one is an incorrect method of treatment. I post things here, Facebook and on Instagram about my progress, my ups and downs for me and so others out there know they are not alone. To be a voice for those who are too scared or worried about the stigma behind any mental illness. Snide remarks about my negativity will not change how I post things. I know that there are many MANY people out there who NEED to know that it is OK to not be ok all the time. The more we talk about our mental health and illnesses the more people will try and understand. Saying one thing is the only way to live with mental illness is so rude and incorrect and very harmful to some people. Do NOT be ashamed of who you are, Do NOT hold back on how you are feeling at this moment, Do NOT be ashamed of the good AND bad days. #rantover #mentalhealth #mentalillness #iamnotashamed #beyourself #enlighten #learn #ptsd #avoidantpersonalitydisorder #borderlinepersonalitydisorder #gad #depression #anxiety #panicattacks Double-tap to edit. Anyone out there interested in learning more about SOME of the Mental Illnesses out there I have included some links ✌🏻️❤️
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I feel dead on the inside. Zombie like. NUMB. The thought of pill popping has entered my mind numerous times. I know I don't want to end up like I was before but I feel like my only friend is in the form of some type of pill. I have a roof over my head, a new car, my fantastic boys, a cat, a dog, a bearded dragon. I have more than most people have but I feel empty and alone. Zero motivation to do shit all with my life. I'm in love with someone who I will never meet or be with because #1 he's as fucked up as I am #2 he does not want to start his life over again. Why must I ALWAYS find the ones that are unattainable? The past 6 years have been very lonely for me but I also realize that I have to fix me before I can allow someone else into my life. I am very troubled. I WANT To be happy with who I am. I want to be able to clean my house and do my laundry. I want to be able to wake up and smile because I know that no matter what the day brings happiness will be part of me. INSTEAD I hate who I am. I'm ugly. I'm fat. The world outside my door scares me. I don't take care of myself properly. Anxiety, rage, numbness and sadness rule my life. #mentalhealth #mentalillness #mentalhealthawareness #ptsd #anxiety #gad #depression #panicattacks #ifeelalone
Went to the ER Wednesday night because I was having one of my really bad anxiety days (like I feel like I'm loosing my mind) I went to the university ER because last time I went there I had a really good experience and found out about the psychiatry department and am finally getting continuous monitoring and care. This time I went it was completely different. I was told there were only 3 beds for pshyc patients so I had to wait in the waiting room with a whole bunch of people (not good for someone with avoidant personality disorder and anxiety disorders) until a bed became free. Approx 5 hours later I was brought into the temporary pshyc bed area (appeantly they are renovating that part of the hospital) it was cold and stuffy and when the nurse came in she asked me if I had any medical issues .....are you fucking kidding me right now??!! Read your god damn papers. I informed her of my medical issues and then she proceeded to tell me a medical dr would be in soon. Soon...SOON....4 hours later this medical dr came in and asked me AGAIN what my issues were. So I explained AGAIN. I was wanting to go into the inpatient program. He told me that they only send people to the inpatient unit if I have attempted suicide or am in psychosis because they have to be choosy on who they allow in because of such high demand. But if I wanted I could wait until the psychiatrists come in at 9 am to evaluate me because they no longer have psychiatrists or psychologists in the ER. What kind of bullshit is that?! Cutbacks he says. Now my anger is setting in and I told him this whole process is rediculous. Mentally ill people need to be able to go to the ER when they don't feel safe and there should be a psychiatrist or psychologist on staff every fucking night. We NEED to have someone there that understands not some random dr that says he does not understand how a pshyciatrist can help anyway. Long story short the mental health system waits until you are so bad that you want to kill yourself or have already tried to kill yourself before you can get inpatient care. I'm sorry but if you allowed people to go and get the care people are asking for there would be less attempts on suiside and less suicides. I am angry with our mental health system so much. It's so broken. I should be able to have the right to want to go to inpatient if I want to. I'm not a high functioning person. Right now I would feel safer and be able to concentrate on just me getting better if I was an inpatient. But I can't because I'm not going around trying to kill people or I'm not in a full psychosis I can't access that care that I feel would help me the most at this point in time. I will no longer go to the ER I made plans with my mom that if I get to the point where I start feeling like I'm going out of my mind I will go to her house. That will be my "safe" place. Canada needs to step up and make a better system for us mentally ill. It's not fair the way it is. I WANT to get better. I WANT to be able to choose what kind of treatment I feel is best for me. #mentalhealth #mentalillness #mentalhealthawareness #ptsd #gad #anxiety #depression #avoidantpersonalitydisorder #borderlinepersonalitydisorder #iamnotashamed #stepupcanada #bellletstalk #canadamentalhealth #albertamentalhealth
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